The Meaning of a Pendant

[ad_1]

What is the significance of a pendant? A pendant is a decoration and symbolization of the things that a person treasures. A favorite past time, a special person, a milestone affair, or something that describes you are just a few ideas of pendants to display on a necklace.

Pendants are great gift ideas, acknowledging a friend or family member's interests. To consider what kind of pendants you can give a loved one, here are some ideas of how you can celebrate some of the things that they treasure most.

Sports pendant- Basketball and jewelry might not mix , but with a sports pendant [http://www.harrismichaeljewelry.com/pendant.html], you can display a friend's passion for a sport in elegant fashion. Whether it's a professional sports team fan, or a friend's identity with a sport, you can find a favorite team pendant or a sports pendant to recognize their interests.

Friendship pendant- A display honoring your best friend can be captured in a friendship pendant. A broken heart split in the middle, this pendant is not to be mistaken by what is described. In elementary or junior high, you might have recalled two friends displaying half of a broken heart, implying their relationship as best friends.

Gemstone pendant- On a loved one's birthday celebrate their birth with a gemstone pendant. As every month has its own gemstone, you will personalize your loved one's birthday with their month's birthstone. A ruby, a sapphire, a diamond or amethyst pendant, a gemstone pendant will be a frequent reminder of the significance of their birth.

Pendant lockets- Such a keepsake as a baby picture will be a treasure for a pendant locket. Giving your mother such a necklace will be her reminder of you as a baby, a phase of nurturing and raising you from the time you were little until now. Thank her with a memorable pendant locket for her to wear so she can always think of you.

If you choose to give your loved one a pendant, just remember that it is not just a gift you're giving them. You will be capturing one of their symbolic treasures in a beautiful necklace, an adornment they will enjoy forever.

[ad_2]

Source by Stephanie Tuia

Cuban Women – How to Taste the Forbidden Fruit of International Dating

[ad_1]

Cuba is an island nation wrapped around rumors, intrigue and the hypnotic pull of a forbidden paradise. The US embargo may have been disastrous on Cuba's economy but it created a vacuum.

Time has stood still in this tiny country of enormous spirit. The values, traditions and family centered-ness of the Cuban people are exactly those, most of us long for in today's "modern" world. Family is the focus; love, care and affection run wild and grow everywhere. The unity created from despair has given birth to a unique woman.

The Cuban woman is born on a tropical island with its sensual rhythms, the push and pull of the ocean and caressing Caribbean breezes. Sexiness is as natural to her as breathing. And because of the economic conditions, she has learned to be intelligent, resourceful, appreciative of what really matters and graceful in all she does.

The women of Cuba have become known (by those in the know) to be the most succulent, sought after angels on planet Earth. These women make the perfect companion, friend, lover, mother and wife.

A "Cubanita" as women from Cuba are known, is a savage in the bedroom, or wherever else she takes you to feed her carnal appetite. She is a pristine lady in public, a chef of the highest caliber in the kitchen. A tour de force in her chosen profession and an intoxicating mate at all times. In essence, the vacuum created in Cuba has bred what some may consider to be the ideal woman.

However, the problem for many men has been how to meet and date these exotic creatures.

The Big Challenge

The big challenge is not where to find Cuban women. After all the grand majority of them are all living in the same 110,860 sq km island 90km off the southern most tip of Florida.

The challenge in meeting these women has been a question of how to get right up next to them.

For men from the US the idea of ​​going to Cuba represents a Federal Offense. For men from other countries such as Canada and Australia it is a voyage to a strange, unknown place the media has made out to be an active war zone.

But why should any government or media hype keep you from finding the woman of your dreams? With today's advances in technology there is little reason to let them.

Tasting The Forbidden Fruit

Internet access is growing in Cuba, although sometimes via underground means. The spreading of awareness and availability of the online world has led to new a trend in Cuba. Cuban women are now putting up profiles in dating and social networking sites on a daily basis.

You can go to several paid dating sites or free sites such as Facebook and Twitter and find Cuban woman already there. While the number of "Cubanitas" online is not as high as the number of other Latinas, such as Dominican women, Colombian women or Costa Rican women ( "Ticas") online, the quality of the Cuban women with online profiles is second to none !

The first step towards getting yourself all tangled up with one or several of these delicious delights is to get online, set up your own profile and start chatting with the Cuban girls on the sites. Most of these women are career orientated and / or currently studying at the university level.

Cubans can get e-mail accounts in most government post offices; this makes communication even easier once you have met a few ladies on line. Additionally cell phone use, particularly cell phones with chat and text capabilities is also growing in Cuba. Once you start making friends with Cuban women online staying in touch is simple, not like in times past when a call to Cuba was a huge deal.

The next step is setting up actual dates. To do this you must plan a trip. And here you have a few choices.

Contrary to popular belief, Cuban's can get travel visas. They just can not get travel visas to countries like the US with any form of ease. But you will find Cuban women who already have travel visas and can visit countries such as Venezuela, Russia and Dominican Republic.

If you are not willing to travel to Cuba you can carefully arrange to meet a special lady friend in a country where she can travel. However the best thing is really for you to go there.

With new regulation being introduced in the US if you are of Cuban descent getting permission to visit Cuba is a reality now. You can go to Cuba, find the woman you want to marry and bring her to the US with a fiancée visa.

If you do not live in the US then you have every reason and opportunity to get on a plane and start dating face-to-face the sizzling "Cubanitas" you meet online.

If you live in the US and are not of Cuban descent getting to the forbidden island nation will be more difficult. You could apply under a humanitarian visa. There are also reports of US citizens who visit Cuba illegally (illegal in the US not Cuba) by first flying to a country such as Mexico. From there they will take a second flight into Cuba. Because Cuba does not stamp their passport there is no evidence of them having entered the country.

At the end of the day, if you meet Cuban women online you will be filled with the courage and sense of purpose required to actually visit with them, hold them, hug them and kiss them.

Love beyond your borders is waiting; all it takes is a little bit of commitment on your part and a few mouse clicks. May you find the love life you most desire and may nothing hold you back from doing so.

[ad_2]

Source by Carlos M Duran

The Parable of The Unprepared Builder Made Simple (Luke 14: 28-30)

[ad_1]

This is returning back to a theme covered in an earlier parable. But it is good to be reminded about this regularly.

I read this parable in the context beginning from Luke 14:26.

26 "If anyone comes to Me and does not hate his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and his own life also, he can not be My disciple. 27 And whoever does not bear his cross and come after Me can not be My disciple.

The word hate here does not necessarily mean the bad way. To be Christ's disciple, we are told to hate our father, mother, wife, children, brothers and sisters, even our own life. "Hate" here means to love less. It then goes to say that anyone who does not love their father, mother, children, brothers, sisters and his own life "less" than God is not worthy of Him. Anyone who does not love everyone who's important to them less than Jesus is not worthy of Jesus.

Jesus set a very high standard here. We all love our family and relatives; we love our own life too. In this passage, Jesus was saying, "You can not be my follower unless you love them less." Some people take this as a strict command literally. For them, this is all too much; this is all too hard.

Sounds impossible?

You might say to yourself, "I really love my wife; I really love my mother and brother, I really love my friends; I love my own life. I can not love Jesus more. What does He expect from me? I can 't do it. "

The apostle Paul said, "I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me (Philippians 4:13)." We can not do it in the natural; but with the Holy Spirit's help, we can love Jesus more than our loved ones and even our own life. And to be honest, until Jesus is in that place, life simply is not as rich as it can be.

I know this can be a scary sort of verse. But this is what the Christian life is going require of you. This is the way you have to be prepared. When we make a decision to follow Jesus, it is with all our heart; with everything we have, no holds barred. It is like saying, "I'm going to devote my life to Him more than anything. I'm going love Him more than anyone."

You see, the trouble is when you become a Christian and you start to act in godly ways, sometimes your family start to act differently towards you. If you are the only Christian in your family, there may be persecutions and tribulations.

Let's get some more context in verse 28, "And whoever does not bear his cross and come after Me can not be My disciple."

Here, Jesus was saying that if you want to be a disciple, there's going be a price to pay. It is one thing to say you love Jesus; it's another thing to be a disciple. A disciple is someone who practices everything that Jesus taught.

The parable starts in verse 28:

28 For which of you, intending to build a tower, does not sit down first and count the cost, whether he has enough to finish it- 29 lest, after he has laid the foundation, and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, 30 saying, 'This man began to build and was not able to finish'?

Living the kingdom way is hard. When people around you find out you're a Christian, they are going to be watching you, just like the builder of this tower. It is not going to be easy leaving your family and loved ones for the sake of Christ.

Let's say you are going build a block of apartments, rent them to people, and make a lot of money. It was your dream and you started in faith. You had a good job and you are confident that you could arrange the finances for the construction. What if in the middle of the project, you suddenly lost your job and you could not pay the loan back? The work stopped suddenly and you felt really foolish.

Or if you had money and you projected a cost but you made a wrong calculation. It says here that before you start something like this, you should sit down with proper accountants and cost analysts for the projection. Because if you start putting up half block of apartments and then you stop building due to bad finances, everyone in the neighborhood is going to laugh at you.

In this passage, Jesus was essentially saying that the Christian life is like that. If you decide to become a Christian, people are going to watch you. And believe me, they are going to laugh at you, mock you and cause all sorts of trouble in your life.

However, Christian life is not at all that bad. Once you get in touch with Jesus and move in the right direction, Christian life is a joyful experience, albeit difficult. It's not something that should be taken lightly.

Through this book, I encourage you to make the decision to give your life to Him. Say the prayer written in the appendix of this book and see the Holy Spirit come into your life.

For some Christians, things may not go as well as you thought they would. Maybe you're stuck, depressed, hurt, broken, you do not have vision, you do not know the purpose of your life, you're not being used, you're not fulfilled. Well, that's not the life God had planned for you. God's has a life for you where you live in total abandonment to Jesus Christ and your life is fully surrendered to Him.

A ship without the sails up just does not go anywhere. But it takes a lot of effort to put those sails up and once they're up the boat meets the resistance of the wind and it sails. And now a boat not only sails with the wind but can go against the wind in a tack and the wind is a very necessary thing for a sailing boat.

Now, if you have not got your sails up in your life to catch the spirit of the living God; if the wind can not move in your sails; if you have not given your life to God and say, "I surrender, Lord"; if you're still trying to run your own life and not allowing the Holy Spirit to give you directions, you're like a ship with no sail up, you're going nowhere.

If you are hundreds of miles at sea, you'll starve and you get in a desperate condition and the seas will break all over you if your sails are not up. You got to learn how to move in the Holy Spirit. But you need to know that Christianity comes with a cost and if you're one of those people who made a decision for Christ and you think it's not working for you now, just take comfort in the fact that Jesus warned us in this parable.

Know that you can have love, success, joy and peace; God can turn tremendous suffering into tremendous joy. You can have purpose in life. Your sin-muddied life can turn into a life of holiness and righteousness.

You can be transformed by God but it comes at a cost. Be prepared to pray to the Lord and surrender your life fully to him. Ask Him to take control.

[ad_2]

Source by Matthew Robert Payne

A Psychological Profile Of Jimi Hendrix

[ad_1]

Jimi Hendrix

Biographical Overview

If ever there was a guitar player who redefined this instrument for anyone who has ever played it before or since, it would be Jimi Hendrix. Jimi's exceptionally creative, powerful, psychedelic licks helped him reach a musical standard that has never been duplicated, and in his four short years as a recording star he established himself as a musical legend without equal. His performances at the Monterrey Pop Festival which established him as a star, and later at Woodstock were some of the most awe-inspiring in the history of live music, and history will remember Jimi Hendrix as one of the most influential albeit enigmatic and mysterious musicians who ever graced the stage.

Jimi Hendrix was born John Allen Hendrix on November 29, 1942 to James (Al) Hendrix and Lucille Jeter in Seattle, Washington. Jimmy's father Al, who would be his primary parental force throughout Jimi's life, was in the Army when Jimi was born. Fearing that Al would go AWOL to go see his newborn son, the army placed Al in the stockade on "general principle" where he stayed for over a month until the army saw fit to release him.

Back in Seattle Jimi's mother Lucille quickly grew tired of being a single parent and virtually abandoned Jimi during his first few years of life. Jimi, then known as Johnny, first lived with Lucille's family, but was then placed with a woman named Mrs. Walls who took Johnny in and cared for him.

Al was finally released from the Army in 1945 when Jimi was three years old. Upon arriving back in the United States, Al regained custody of Johnny and promptly named him James after himself. Originally Jimi was known as "Buster" by his family, but at the age of 6 everyone began calling young James "Jimi" which would stick with him for the rest of his short life. Between the ages of 3 and 6 Al raised Jimi with the assistance of Lucille's Sister Dolores, and Jimi became very close to her children who were being raised in the same home.

When Jimi was 6, his mother briefly came back into Jimi's life when Al and Lucille attempted a reconciliation. Because there was little work in Seattle at the time, Al joined the Merchant Marines, and while he was away Lucille returned to her old carefree lifestyle, and was kicked out of the housing the Hendrix's were residing in for having inappropriate male visitors. Upon his return from the Merchant Marines, Al and the family reunited, and Lucille eventually had another son Leon in 1948, who had Asian features and was clearly not Al Hendrix's son. Lucille eventually had another son Joey by still a different father, and Al eventually divorced Lucille in 1950 as a result of her lack of stability.

Over the next few years Al raised Jimi and Leon with the help of his relatives, and Jimi briefly had another maternal figure "Edna" enter his life, who he grew close to but who was eventually forced to leave the Hendrix home to make room for other relatives. Lucille popped in and out of Jimi's life during his formative years, and would make extravagant promises to Jimi that she would not follow through on. On February 2, 1958, following many years of hard drinking and frivolity, Lucille passed away at the age of 32 which deeply saddened Jimi.

In his teen years Al Hendrix bought Jimi his first electric guitar which Jimi became so attached to that he slept with it on a nightly basis. Jimi was eventually recruited by a man named James Thomas, and Jimi then became a member of James Thomas and the Tomcats. During this same time frame, Jimi, who had grown disinterested in school, dropped out of Garfield High, and also got in trouble for being in a stolen car. Jimi eventually joined the Army during this period, and decided he wanted to be a paratrooper in the Screaming Eagles like his father before him.

Jimi met Billy Cox while in the Army and the two of them had a great deal in common including musical tastes. While in the army they begin to play a little together, and they formed a friendship and partnership that would later be rekindled when Jimi formed the band Band Of Gypsies.

Following his stint in the Army, Jimi moved down south and began playing the "Chitlin" circuit where he used the stage names "Maurice James" and "Jimmie James" and had some success as a guitar player. Jimi would even play backup on a Supremes record, and in 1964 he played with the Isley Brothers who were also very popular at the time. It was during this period when Jimi met Little Richard, who was a bit of a narcissist, and felt that Jimi's guitar playing upstaged him and took the focus off him which he felt was a necessary component of the act.

Jimi eventually split with Little Richard and moved to New York City where he at first had little success. After spending some time in Harlem, Jimi settled into the Greenwich Village neighborhood, where he formed a new band called Jimmy James and the Blue Flames. Jimi's unique improvisational style alienated a number of his fans, while others thought they were witnessing the birth of a genius. One of these people was Chas Chandler, who formerly played base for a band called the Animals who knew when he saw Jimi that he had discovered an amazing new talent. Chas convinced Jimi that he would have more success in England than in the United States, and in 1966 Jimi packed his bags and left the US to live in London.

While in London Jimi met Mitch Mitchell and Noel Redding, and the three of them formed the band The Jimi Hendrix Experience and begin touring around England. Jimi dazzled the English crowd, who were alternately shocked and amazed by Jimi, and he was described in the English papers as "The Wild Man of Borneo" which was a kind of racial slur against Jimi's heritage. The group was very successful, and their first album Are You Experienced produced the songs Hey Joe and Purple Haze which were both big hits on the English rock charts.

Jimi's breakthrough performance came upon his return to the Unites States at the Monterrey Pop Festival where his use of distortion and feedback on the guitar helped him create a sound previously unheard by American audiences. With the crowd already in a frenzy over his performance, Jimi set his guitar on fire at the end of his set, which further electrified the crowd and created a buzz about Jimi Hendrix that would propel him to the top of the music world.

One important ally Jimi made during this time was Brian Jones from the Rolling Stones, who introduced Jimi at Monterrey and was one of Jim's first important fans in the world of music. Following his performance at Monterrey, Brian introduced to Jimi to a lot of important people in California, which culminated in The Jimi Hendrix Experience being signed to go on tour with the Monkees who were one of the top drawing bands in the world at this time.

Jimi's wild style and sexually explicit actions on stage were not well suited to the Monkees crowd, and soon this tour dissolved and The Jimi Hendrix Experience began touring on their own. Over the next two years the band became hugely successful, and in addition to Hey Joe and Purple Haze, produced songs such as Castles Made of Sand, and Bob Dylan's All Along the Watchtower, which were all big hits for the band. The band eventually produced three hit albums, Are You Experienced, Axis: Bold as Love, and Electric Ladyland which all were huge successes. The band was not without its difficulties however, as Jimi and Noel Redding had difficulties agreeing on several issues related to the band, and in the summer of 1969 the band broke up despite the fact that they were at the peak of their commercial success.

Some speculated that Jimi broke up The Jimi Hendrix Experience because both of his bandmates were white, and that he was receiving pressure from the Black Panthers to make a statement about Black solidarity. Although Jimi did have an association with the Panthers in the 1960's, he used the standard "creative differences" approach to explain the band's breakup. But in any case it was apparent that he was hurt by all of the negative press he received following this incident.

Following the breakup of The Jimi Hendrix Experience Jimi began heavily using drugs, and a major turning point came in his life when he was arrested on May 3, 1969 at the Toronto airport for possession of Heroin and Marijuana. Jimi adamantly claimed the drugs were not his, but was rightfully disturbed at the prospect of facing seven years in prison, and thought a great deal about his legacy following his arrest. Jimi was eventually cleared of these charges, but still faced a great deal of inner turmoil as a result of this experience.

In the summer of that year, Jimi put together a group of musicians to play with him at Woodstock, and his performance there was one that helped cement his legend as one of the truly inspired live performers in the history of music. His Star-Spangled Banner on guitar was a huge hit with the fans, and would later become one of the featured scenes in the Woodstock film recordings that were produced at the festival. Later that year Jimi would also play at England's answer to Woodstock, called The Isle of White Festival, where he also dazzled and amazed his English fans, many of who had been with him from the beginning.

At the end of his life, Jimi reunited with his old army buddy Billy Cox, and they formed the Band of Gypsies, which would be Jimi's final group. This group had some success, but Jimi was beginning to become fatigued from years of working almost constantly, his continuing drug use, and the anxiety he felt arising from battles with his management, and earnings in the millions that he could not account for.

In September of that year, as the group was touring Europe, Jimi Hendrix was found dead on his hotel room floor as a result of an overdose of sleeping pills that caused him to choke on his own vomit. Jimi's death was highly controversial however, as some claim he was mishandled by paramedics which caused him to eventually suffocate on the way to the hospital. Jimi's death has been thoroughly investigated and researched, and despite all of the claims, a coroner's report confirms that Jimi had been dead for some time when he was eventually found on the morning of September 18th.

The legacy of Jimi Hendrix endures, and many still consider him to be the most unique guitar player that ever lived. His estate has made millions of dollars following his death, most of which was originally hidden from his father by unscrupulous managers of Jimi's affairs. Al Hendrix and his family eventually won back Jimi's legacy with the help of Microsoft co-founder Paul Allen, and Allen would eventually go on to build a Jimi Hendrix museum called the Experience Music project, which is a major tourist attraction in Seattle Washington.
Analysis
Gender Role Preparation perceived through Gender Guiding Lines and Role Models

Though his interactions with his father, Jimi learned the values ​​of hard work and perseverance that would guide him throughout his life and career. Although Jimi was occasionally portrayed as a spaced-out wild man under the influence of LSD, he was in fact an extremely hard worker who produced an amazing amount of material in his short career.

Jimi's father also instilled in Jimi the value of perseverance. Through all of his struggles with his wife Lucille, job difficulties, prejudice, etc, Al Hendrix continued to soldier on and raise his boy Jimi, and this lesson was not lost on his young son. This value of perseverance was so strong in Jimi that he practiced his guitar so often and so much that he eventually became a virtuoso. With no ability to read music and no real training, Jimi still managed to teach himself to play the guitar with his right hand despite the fact that he was born left-handed. All of these obstacles must have made the guitar very difficult for Jimi to learn, but through watching his father Jimi learned a man never gives up, and he therefore continued to work tirelessly at learning to play his guitar.

Jimi's female gender guiding line was much more complex. Although Jimi loved his mother, she disappeared often in his life, and Jimi was well aware of her infidelities towards his father. Later in his life Jimi's interactions with women appeared to be unstable, and his fear of commitment with women may very well have arisen from watching his mother's irresponsible behavior.

Jimi's mistrust of women is interesting to consider with regard to one of the women he was the closest to named Devon Wilson. Devon was a former prostitute, heavy drug user, and party girl who had also been romantically linked to Mick Jagger during the late 1960's. Devon lived with Jimi at his New Your apartment, handled many of Jimi's affairs, and was even the subject of one of Jimi's songs called Dolly Dagger. Like Jimi's mother Lucille, Devon would often disappear for days at a time and then come back when she was done with her extended binge. The fact that, despite Jimi's access to so many women, he trusted a clearly irresponsible woman like Devon Wilson to get closest to him, seems to suggest that he may have chosen her because her behavior was so much like his mother's growing up.
Interpersonal Style perceived through Experience of Family Atmosphere

On the subject of Jimi's mother, she and Al fought often while Jimi was growing up, and the Hendrix household was often filled with storm and strife when Lucille was around. Watching his mother and father fight so often appeared to affect Jimi's own relationships with women, as he was on several occasions verbally and even physically violent with women during periods of confrontation.

Jimi also lived in a number of different homes and places growing up, and in this capacity learned not to get too close to people as they may abandon you at any time. One poignant story Jimi himself related involved meeting his father for the first time at the age of three and taking the train from Berkeley to Seattle. Jimi recalled how much he wanted to return to the only "family" he had ever really known, and how odd it was to be taken on a train by some strange man he had never met. This sense of instability was reinforced often throughout Jimi's life, as a number of people would be significant in his life for a couple of years and then simply disappear, and this appears to have affected Jimi's ability to trust and get close to people.

Because Jimi was unable to achieve a sense of stability, he developed a shy and introverted personality that caused him a great deal of loneliness. Jimi dealt with painful feelings through artistic expression, and the ultimate capacity of his talent may have been a reflection of the intensity of his painful feelings.
Personal Code of Conduct Perceived through Acceptance / Rejection of Family Values

The family values ​​in the Hendrix household involved obedience to authority and a healthy respect for one's elders, and although Jimi had respect for his father, he came to distrust authority in his own life. There are many different versions of Jimi's life with Al Hendrix, many of which paint a picture of a very unhappy home life where Al constantly reminded his children of the sacrifices he had to make for his children. In Al's own autobiography My Son Jimmy (1999) he talked about how Jimi used to escape responsibility for his actions by blaming misdeeds on an imaginary friend named "Sessy" who Jimmy would evoke when he felt he had disappointed Al. It certainly must have been difficult for Al to raise Jimi by himself, and given the economic climate in Seattle at that time, there's no doubt that Al must have had to make some great sacrifices for Jimi. Perhaps Jimi's creation of an imaginary friend was a psychological defense against Al's disappointment, which seemed to be yet another factor in Jimi's unhappy childhood.

Another family value that Jimi seemed to reject concerned the family's views on religion. Although Jimi was raised by a church-going family who believed in worship, Jimi came to believe that his music was a form of great spiritual expression. Jimi rejected the stifling versions of Christianity he learned as a young man, and instead felt music was the way he could connect to the mystical and spiritual side of life.

Music also offered an escape for Jimi from his problems, and was certainly a positive adaptation for him to an unhappy childhood. Jimi often described how music would compose itself in his head, and his unparalleled talent in music may have been a result of this intense desire to escape his emotionally painful cognitions.
Perspective on the World perceived through Experience of Psychological Birth Order

As the first born son in the Hendrix household and the only son sired by his father Al, Jimi developed a sense that he was particularly special when he was a young man. Although Jimi's younger brother Leon spent a great deal of time with Jimi and his father growing up, he was also often shipped to another family during difficult times. The fact that Jimi was always the one that remained with his father must have made him feel like the "chosen" one much of the time, and he appeared to develop a sense that he was something special. This is not an uncommon reaction from a first born child, as they often receive more attention than their siblings do when they are born, as they become literally the center of their parent's universe.

For Jimi this situation did not unfold exactly like this, as his first three years were filled with a great deal of moving around that must have confused and frightened him at such a fragile age. The two women that adopted Jimi in these years both referred to his "specialness" however, so one can assume this was something he felt that was further reinforced when Al eventually came and got him following his release from the Army.

Jimi's biographers (Hendrix 1999) discuss how it was clear to Jimi that his younger brother Leon had a different father than him, and although Al certainly loved and cared for Leon, he must have felt some resentment from having to raise another man's child. Jimi therefore was the "favorite" growing up, and developed a sense of his own uniqueness that instilled in him a great deal of confidence in his abilities. This confidence was especially relevant in the early stages of Jimi's career, where audiences often disliked and were unable to understand his unique style of music. Although many artists would have become discouraged in this situation, Jimi was convinced of his own talent, and much of this resolve appears to have its roots in Jimi's early childhood experiences.
Self Assessment Perceived through Genetic Possibilities

Jimi Hendrix came from a talented family with a long history of performing in front of groups. Jimi's grandmother was an entertainer who traveled and worked as a singer and performer before her son Al was born, and even prior to this generation music was a strong part of the Hendrix tradition. Jimi's father Al and his uncle Leon both showed musical talent at a very young age, and both of them could play the piano, sing, and also dance at a young age, and often did so growing up. Jimi therefore appeared to have a predisposition to music that was inherited from the talented Hendrix family.

Jimi developed a stutter at a young age however, and was not confident as a singer and a dancer like the rest of his family. Therefore when Jimi did find a musical instrument to play, it appears that he compensated for his stutter by practicing a great deal on the guitar in an attempt to belong with his otherwise musical family.

Jimi also felt a strong identification with his family's Cherokee heritage. The extent of Jimi's Indian blood has been misrepresented often in several biographies that mention the subject. Jimi's father Al (Hendrix 1999) eventually clarified that Jimi's great grandmother was a full-blooded Cherokee, but Jimi did feel a strong identification with this portion of his ancestry. Al Hendrix explained that when Jimi and the other children played games like Cowboys and Indians when Jimi was a kid, Jimi always wanted to be the Indian as it helped link him with a part of his Heritage. Jimi created a great deal of art as a child that depicted the Indians conquering the cavalry, and he even discussed later as an adult how he felt a sense of power that came from his Indian blood.

In considering this idea it is fascinating to examine the lyrics from one of Jimi's big hits, Castles Made of Sand-

"A little Indian brave who before he was ten, played war games in The woods with his Indian friends, and he built a dream that when he Grew up, he would be a fearless warrior Indian Chief. Many moons passed and more the dream grew strong, until tomorrow He would sing his first war song,
And fight his first battle, but something went wrong,
Surprise attack killed him in his sleep that night "

Reading the lyrics to this song which Jimi wrote, one can not help but wonder how much it reflected both Jimi's dreams as well as his disappointments. In many ways this song demonstrated the conditions of Jimi's life, as, despite having "conquered" the music world, he still was very anxious about his life circumstances as a result of his arrest and also the large amounts of money he was missing. Much like the little Indian in the story, Jimi had been blindsided by events in his life, and this song seems to reveal the depths of his unhappiness.
Openings for Advancement perceived through Environmental Opportunities

One important adaptation Jimi made as a young man concerned the first guitar he ever received which Al purchased for Jimi for the price of 5 dollars. Jimi, who was born left-handed but learned to do most things right-handed, changed the strings around on this right-handed guitar and instead played it left-handed which was an adaptation that would eventually have a direct impact on his future musical genius. Jimi learned that by manipulating the instrument like this he could get different sounds out of it, and later as an adult he played his guitars both upside down and backwards which helped him carve out his own unique sound that no one else was readily able to replicate . Because Jimi made this adaptation at such a young age and practiced so excessively, his technique became something that was uniquely his.

Another early experience that shaped the young Jimi Hendrix was seeing an Elvis Presley concert while he was growing up in Seattle. Jimi became fascinated by Elvis's showmanship, and much of his early artwork produced flattering pictures of the King. Although Jimi was somewhat shy throughout his life, on stage he truly had no inhibitions, and at least some of this he learned from watching Elvis when he was a young man. The impact of seeing Elvis live seemed to awaken in Jimi a sense of the heights a person could reach through playing music, and this rare opportunity was for Jimi a tipping point that helped give birth to his eventual persona as a stage performer.
Range of Social Interest perceived through Other Particularities

One barometer of a person's mental health can be observed by examining their relationships and interest in the welfare of other human beings. Jimi Hendrix, who appeared to have abandonment issues related to his childhood, and who had also been betrayed by several business associates, therefore seemed to have trouble developing a profound sense of social interest. Although Jimi was often approached about social causes, he seemed to be most comfortable letting his music do his talking for him, and did not feel as comfortable as an advocate and leader to promote social change as many of his 60's counterparts.

In this capacity it is interesting to consider Jimi's relationship with the Black Panthers as well as the larger issue of racism in the life of Jimi Hendrix. Growing up Jimi watched his father experience a great deal of racism related to finding jobs, etc. and this must have affected the young Jimi a great deal, as a lot of his early artwork depicts struggles for equality and justice. Jimi also experienced racism following his release from the Army when he went to play the "Chitlin" circuit in the Southern United States, where there was clearly different treatment for white and black musicians.

Jimi was eventually discovered a white man Chas Chandler, and found fame and acceptance with two white musicians who were of course Noel Redding and Mitch Mitchell. Although Jimi found success in the UK with these two men, he was still mocked by the British papers as "the wild man of Borneo" and with other racial epitaphs that appeared to alternatively mock and praise Jimi. Jimi eventually became known for playing "white" music by some of the more extremist black national groups in the United States, and many speculate it was the Black Panthers who pushed Jimi into eventually disbanding the Jimi Hendrix experience to form an all-Black band. Although there are widely varying accounts as to Jimi's relationship with the Panthers, it seems clear that Jimi was heavily conflicted about the issue of race.

In terms of social interest, Jimi's use of escapism through music is also interesting to examine. Music appeared to be the one thing that let him escape painful thoughts and feelings, and it was only when he had to quit playing and deal with other human beings when he seemed to be unhappy. People certainly took terrible advantage of Jimi throughout his life, as he died with only 21,000 thousand dollars in his banking account as a result of people pilfering millions from him over the course of his career. Jimi's lack of social interest therefore appeared to be based on very real experiences with people in the world, as his early home life and professional career were filled with repeated abandonment, disappointments, and betrayals from those that he thought he could depend on.

Jimi also had a great deal of narcissism, much of which contributed to the development of his music, which was also a defining characteristic of his personality. Many people who had experienced the kind of rejection Jimi had at the beginning of his career would have simply returned to playing mainstream music, but Jimi truly believed that his music was something special despite the negative reinforcement he had received from the New York crowds. A narcissist will often believe his or her own way is not only special and unique, but also better than the way anyone else is doing it, and this was very much demonstrated by Jimi's creation of his own music.

Although narcissism is often malignant, many exceptionally talented people demonstrate high levels of this trait in their dealings with others, which was certainly true in the case of Jimi Hendrix. When someone disagrees with or challenges someone who is malignantly narcissistic, their reaction may be extreme irritation, and Jimi's interpersonal relationships seemed to represent this idea. His habitually abusive behavior towards women showed Jimi had a very low tolerance for frustration, and when others, and particularly women disagreed with him, his response to this frustration was very often physical violence.

Jimi's violence towards women may have also arisen in part from his interactions with his mother Lucille, as Jimi never seemed to develop a healthy respect for women throughout his life. His lack of a consistent feminine presence and maternal gender guiding line growing up must have created some anger in Jimi, and hearing his father's descriptions of his mother's life may have also contributed to this dynamic.

Jimi's life was therefore empty of the kind of social interest in others that many felt was a larger part of the idealism of the 1960's. Although Jimi participated in some of the causes and issues of his times, his involvement was often at the recommendation of those around him. Jimi's lack of trust in other people, which had its roots in childhood patterns, was reinforced often throughout his life, and Jimi overcompensated for his lack of interest in others by developing a truly awe-striking ability that allowed him to escape from the world. Although this talent was extraordinary, it seemed to be in part created through the sublimation of his personal pain, and this left Jimi without a path other than music in which to actively experience joy in his life. Jimi's gift of music to the world was and is a lasting contribution that influenced thousands of musicians both before and after him, but was also in many ways a reaction to a troubled history, and this was the sadness and irony of this truly unique musician.

[ad_2]

Source by Joe Guse

Do's And Don'ts Of Wearing Jewelry To A Friend's Wedding

[ad_1]

Whether you agree or not, but you will any day enjoy your bestie's wedding more than your own wedding. Therefore, do not you think you need to look amazing on this day? You never know, you might bump into a guy who might become your future "prince charming" (of course, if you are single and ready to mingle). To bedazzle everyone at your friend's wedding, all you need to do is pamper yourself in a professional spa, pick a designer Indian attire, choose some dazzling Indian jewelry and of course, choose the ethnic bag that goes with it. You may confidently choose all the above-mentioned stuff to doll up, but in the case of jewelry, you need to be very careful.

Jewelry are the stuff that makes your attire look even better, so you need to pick the right trinkets that'll not just make your outfit look stunning, but will also make you pretty. Here are some do's and don'ts that will help you accessorize your outfit:

Do's of wearing jewelry to a friend 's wedding:

• The first and foremost thing that you have to do is choose ornaments according to your outfit. While purchasing an ornament, you must always make sure that they compliment the attire really well; or else, it will turn into a disaster. For example, with ethnic attire purchase a jadau or polki set, and with western wear purchase a trendy statement necklace or earrings that would increase your attire's charm.

• If you want to look modern and chic, purchase latest designer ornaments to look marvelous. For instance, Victorian styled jewelry are trending, so what you can do is purchase a Victorian statement necklace or earrings, that would do justice to your outfit.

• Play with colored ornaments as much as possible, especially if your outfit has a single tone or color. For instance, if you are donning a fully black outfit, then try to accessorize it with colorful statement pieces, such as statement necklace that has hot pink colored beads / stones.

Don'ts of wearing jewelry to a friend's wedding:

• If you are planning to purchase trinkets according to the color of your outfit, hold on! That's not at all a good idea. The 'matchy-matchy' concept has lost its existence long back. Now, it's time to mix and match your clothes with accessories.

• Do not over accessorize your outfit, otherwise you are going to look very cheap. While wearing ornaments keep the "less is more" concept in your mind.

• Do not put on too many statement pieces, because that's not going you look ultra-attractive. Just remember one thing, statement necklaces or earrings are worn to create a "statement" and to drags everyone's attention onto that particular dazzling piece of jewelry. But, if you put on too many statement pieces, then the people will not be able to focus on any one piece; and on top of that, the entire look will be spoilt as it will look over accessorized.

These were the do's and don'ts of wearing jewelry to a friend's wedding or any other occasion. From now onward, follow the above given tips and accordingly accessorize your attire.

[ad_2]

Source by Pallabi Ray Chaudhuri

Women's Cosmic Personality Quiz: Are You a Star Woman or an Earth Mother?

[ad_1]

Star Women are visionary leaders, and focused on the future. Earth
Mothers are focused on nurturing, caring, and giving. Knowing which of
these beautiful images best represents you can lend you a better
understanding of your own nature and improve your relationships with
others.

All women have both Earth Mother and Star Woman attributes, but one
is your primary identity. When the situation requires it, we can call forth
the other personality type to help us. "

Find out where you stand in the cosmos. Give yourself one point for
each statement that is most often true about you:

  1. I would rather lead than follow.
  2. I hate housework.
  3. I always dreamed of having my own business.
  4. I am very ambitious.
  5. I love envisioning the future and making it happen.
  6. I take more risks than most other people.
  7. I am decisive.
  8. I'll do almost anything to avoid feeling dependent on other people.
  9. I usually make more money than my partner or the men I date.
  10. My partner works for me.
  11. In a group situation I always end up taking charge.
  12. I can be so focused on my goals that I do not notice people's feelings.
  13. I'm more comfortable being in control most of the time.
  14. I sometimes act like a prima donna.
  15. I pursue my goals relentlessly.
  16. I think more about the big picture than the details.
  17. I'm good at inspiring other people to take action.
  18. I have difficulty relaxing and putting work aside.
  19. I feel that I'm here to accomplish something really important.
  20. I'm always thinking and planning far ahead.

SCORING

1 – 7 Points – Earth Mother

Thank goodness for strong Earth Mothers! We need the nurturing,
sustaining energy you grounded gals bring to this world. Earth Mothers
derive great satisfaction from selflessly giving, serving and helping other
people. Their power and leadership abilities are directed towards
others. They are the wonderful women who attend to, and care for, their
families and communities.
Because Earth Mothers often have trouble saying "no" to others and
tend to be people pleasers, you may find yourself easy prey for
domineering men. Work on finding your inner center of power so you
will have the emotional strength to make sure your needs and opinions
are taken seriously.
8 – 13 Points – Combination Earth Mother & Star Woman

A great many women have managed to cultivate a wonderful balance of
both Earth Mother and Star Women characteristics. Gentle but powerful,
combination women are a force to be reckoned with!

In certain circumstances or periods of life, you may find yourself leaning
more closely to one role or the other. Revel in your ability to balance the
combination and be proud of all you are.
14 – 20 Points – Star Woman

Welcome to the cosmic club of Star Women! You gung-ho gals are
natural born leaders who are driven to set and accomplish goals and
who persuade and inspire others. Ambitious visionaries, Star Women
are often destined for greatness.
While Star Women possess a great masculine, action-oriented type of
energy, you may find yourself a little short in the nurturing and empathy
department. This can make you appear cold or standoffish to others.
Work on developing a pool of more gentle, receptive feminine energy to
balance things out and let your softer side show.

[ad_2]

Source by Barbara Wright Abernathy

The Psychology of Children

[ad_1]

On the need to focus on childhood events along with the developmental theories for a comprehensive psychology of children

Child psychology is associated with the social and personal development of children and a child goes through several stages before stepping into the adult world. The psychology of children has been studied from various perspectives including issues of nature and nurture and whether the child is a product of genes and heredity or a product of society and environment as also different developmental stages of sensory discrimination and perception, emotional expression and learning through language and cognitive development, development of intelligence and the socialization process. The study of child sexuality and sexual and moral development are also very important especially from a psychoanalytic viewpoint.

Children are vulnerable and affected easily by all events in the immediate environment. Events which are only trivial or unimportant to adults, may leave deep scars or memories in a child's mind. A child's mind is extremely impressionable and changeable and before the child reaches adolescence, certain very insignificant events can have great personal significance in a child's life. So 'childhood memories' and 'childhood events' are primary factors in determining adult personality pattern. Some major factors which can affect a child's later development and have potential long term effects are:

1. Loss or gain of a friend or friends
2. Memorable physical / bodily sensations
3. Separation in the family or divorce of parents
4. Domestic abuse or violence
5. Sexual molestation or abuse
6. Learning experiences either at play or during study
7. Personal experiences / events that evoked strong emotions of fear, joy, sorrow etc.
8. Accidents or illnesses experienced or observed
9. Death of family members, neighbors or close ones
10. Change of residence or relocation
11. Emotional relationships with friends, teachers or family members
12. Personal success or failure in school
13. Influence of films, stories, books or news events
14. War, terrorism, conflicts, bomb attacks etc.
15. Natural calamities like earthquakes, flood, famine etc.

The factors here are very general and every child goes through certain very specific events that affect him or her individually although there are certain very general theories in psychology that have been established through research studies and these theories have highlighted links between success or failure in later life and childhood events. Some of the major theorists of child development are John Bowlby, Sigmund Freud, Jean Piaget, Lawrence Kohlberg and Lev Vygotsky. Whereas Bowlby emphasized on childhood relationships, Piaget focused on cognitive development of the child through various stages and Freud wrote extensively on sexual development of children. Kohlberg studied moral development of children whereas Vygotsky analyzed the socialization process of children through social contextualism. All these theories on different aspects of child development only prove the immense complexity and the varied number of factors that tend to play a role in the psychological development of children. There are many dimensions to the psychology of children from social, emotional to cognitive, sexual and moral. Here I will provide a brief account of all these different theories and finally provide a comprehensive analysis on how these theories could be used along with the general factors listed above in the study of the psychology of children.

John Bowlby, a British psychiatrist, developed the 'attachment theory' in which he emphasized the importance of a mother or primary caregiver in a child's life. He showed in his study that any infant should develop and maintain a warm and intimate relationship with the mother or mother substitute and all maternal deprivation can lead to serious mental health problems in the child later in life. Bowlby's theory is very true and a mother should develop a strong physical and emotional intimacy with the child by being physically close to the child at least until the child is 2 years old. Doctors around the world have recommended breast feeding and an important part of this is the physical closeness between the child and the mother which is extremely necessary once the child is out of the mother's womb. When the child is released from the mother's womb, the first emotion is fear and the mother's continued physical closeness instills confidence and a sense of security in the child. Orphaned children or children who are separated from their mothers at birth require a substitute or they can grow up as mentally ill or maladjusted individuals.

Freud on the other hand provided a complete psychosexual theory and emphasized on what many of us do not like to believe – the sexual pleasure of children. Freud overturned the concept of childhood innocence and suggested that we are born with our unrepressed basic instincts which are slowly tempered with social adaptation. Freud believed that the inherent pleasure seeking desires that we are born with focus on certain erogenous zones of the body and accordingly there are different stages of psychosexual development from oral and anal to phallic, latent and genital stages. In psychosexual development, the child's pleasure seeking behavior changes from the mouth as in sucking and biting to the anus through toilet training and then finally to the genitals. Thus the child according to psychoanalysis derives complete sexual pleasure by sucking, biting, playing with genitals and releasing waste by defecation. I do not necessarily endorse Freud's views on the sexual pleasure of children and the pleasure derived from bodily sensations could be explained in other ways as I will discuss in another article.

Jean Piaget, a French-Swiss philosopher established the theory of cognitive development in children and laid out four developmental stages – the sensorimotor period, the pre-operational stage, the concrete operational stage and the formal operational stage. The first stage is when the child develops spatial abilities and comes to terms with the world through the senses during the first two years of life. The second stage is about developing and using concepts when children understand meaning of things and this continues until the age of 7. From 7-11 years the child reaches higher cognitive development through concrete operational stage and can sort and classify objects and can use logic to solve problems. The formal operational stage that begins around 12 years of age helps children to understand abstract thoughts, hidden meanings etc. Kohlberg provided a theory of moral development of children through six stages of pre-conventional, conventional and post-conventional levels. These are related to concerns for punishment and self interest, as also inner need for conformity and striving for social order, as maintaining universal ethical principles. So moral development seems to move from a belief of 'what is right and what is wrong' and whether there is punishment for the wrong to what is universally ethical and acceptable social behavior. Another prominent psychologist Vygotsky highlighted the importance of socialization and interpersonal communication and child development according to this theory is seen as an internalization of social and cultural knowledge.

Of course, all these theories will have to be added up and a complete or comprehensive theory that would provide an insight into the child's mind and behavior will have components from all these theories. In addition childhood experiences and events which have been highlighted in psychoanalytic theories are also extremely important and not just from a sexual point of view. All the general factors that I have mentioned in the beginning of the essay should be considered as factors that underlie social, sexual, moral, emotional, physical and cognitive development of children. As learning experiences lead to cognitive development, personal emotional experiences lead to later emotional development and maturity. Sexual molestation, abuse or other types of bodily sensations in childhood affect later sexual development and divorce or separation in the family can affect moral development. Thus an individual who has been molested as a child may either develop a fear of sexual activity or may show complete lack of sexual restraint as an adult.

A child who has lived without a father may either become extremely irresponsible or can develop into an adult with a very strong sense of parental responsibility. Experiencing trauma in childhood through death or accidents of family members or living in times of war, natural calamities have deep impact on children and can leave a perennial sense of insecurity or a need for attachment in the children which continues through adulthood and even old age or on the other hand these events can make a child isolated, schizophrenic or simply detached in later life. For healthy life of children it is important to not just depend on psychological theories to understand how a child grows up and perceives the world, but it is also important to focus on events or experiences of the child and use these along with the theories for complete psychological understanding of children.

In contemporary child psychology the focus on events is mainly psychoanalytic and the impact of adverse events is considered especially significant. However it is important that all events, positive and negative are considered and this should then be used to complement psychological theories. To understand the child, it is important to understand the child's world and memories so an 'event-based' psychology of children should be balanced with a 'theory-based' psychology of children.

[ad_2]

Source by Saberi Roy

Elderly Dementia Can Devastate Caregivers

[ad_1]

My friend called me today in tears. Her mother, who has dementia and paranoia, snapped; really, "snapped" is such a useless word to describe what happens when caring for an elderly parent with dementia. It does not begin to describe the devastation it causes the caregiver.

One of the least talked about anomalies of elder caregiving is the rage and anger that can suddenly flare up. This anger is totally directed at the home caregiver who has probably been doing everything possible to make her parent feel safe, comfortable and loved. Everything was fine until something set Mom off. It could be something from the past she has been dwelling on for some time; maybe an old incident regarding money, a lost friendship, a cheating husband. Whatever, the train of thought, Mom has now zeroed in on you, caregiver.

Most likely the tirade will begin by the caregiven telling the home caregiver how much they are hated. "Do you know how much I hate you?" "You think you are really something and you are nothing." "I want to go home." Today, it just all boiled over and in an instant Mom became another person. Her tone of voice changed, her facial expressions changed, her language became a barrage of swearing; words you had never heard her use before. She grabbed your arm with a strength you did not think she had. It seemed that the tirade of venomous words would never stop. You are in total shock; your mouth hanging open.

Actually, it is probably best, your mouth hanging open, because you can not reason with a person who has dementia. Why, because they have lost the capacity to reason. If the person is paranoid, too, you really just have to wait for the caregiven to run out of anger.

As a caregiver, I was often shocked at the vehement energy projected during one of these episodes and the only comeback that I ever used that worked was, "I love you, too, Mom". This simple statement seemed to deflate the situation.

You, dear caregiver, need to understand that your parent will not remember this episode.

This is the time when you have to dig deep within your soul; stop the tears, grow a spine of steel and move forward with grace, compassion and understanding. Just know that most every elder caregiver will experience this. Do not internalize these hurtful words; just learn and be prepared.

[ad_2]

Source by Judith Davenport

How to Afford Surrogacy

[ad_1]

Making the decision to find a surrogate mother is not an easy one, both emotionally and financially. By the time a typical infertile couple comes to the conclusion that surrogacy might be the best way to grow their family, they have already spent countless amounts of money on various infertility treatments. And surrogacy is the most expensive infertility treatment of them all!

A typical gestational surrogacy can run anywhere from $ 30,000 on the low end, to upwards of $ 100,000 +. In addition to the surrogate's compensation, intended parents need to account for clinic fees, medications, attorney fees, agency fees, maternity care, travel expenses and any other expense that occurs in a pregnancy.

So how are intended parents able to afford it? The truth is, surrogacy is financially out of reach for most couples. The ones that do choose surrogacy usually make incredible sacrifices in order to afford it.

Saving in Advance
The most practical method of affording surrogacy is to save in advance. Intended parents can sacrifice vacations, new cars, and other high-cost items in addition to saving every spare dollar and employment bonuses.

The problem with this is the sheer amount of time it takes to save up these kinds of funds. Couple that with the fact that many couples going through infertility are older parents to begin with, and you can see why this option is unattractive to many.

Financing
Some intended parents choose to take a second mortgage out on their homes or to take on some other sort of financial loan to afford surrogacy. It is even possible for some of them to borrow money from a family member. The downfall to this option is bringing a baby or babies into their lives on top of heavy debt.

Choosing Traditional Surrogacy
Gestational surrogacy can be very expensive, but a lesser expensive alternative is traditional surrogacy. Since a traditional surrogate mother becomes impregnated via artificial insemination, the in vitro fertilization fees are non-existent.

Some traditional surrogates will do home inseminations, eliminating the need for a clinic altogether. This can save the intended parents tens of thousands of dollars. The baby, however, would not be the biological child of the intended mother.

Trimming Fees
There are several fees intended parents may be able to trim, or even eliminate, when looking at surrogacy. Choosing to find a surrogate mother, either gestational or traditional, without the services of an agency is one option. Another option is to find a surrogate with a good health insurance plan.

There is also the option of finding a surrogate with low, or even nonexistent fees. Though it may seem impossible, there are many, many surrogates who would be willing to accept a low compensation to help another family achieve their dreams. In addition, sometimes a family member or close friend can act as a surrogate mother for the intended parents free of charge.

Egg Donation
Another option for surrogacy involves the intended mother becoming an egg donor herself. If her eggs are of good quality, and her infertility problems stem from her inability to carry a child, she might be able to receive compensation as an egg donor for another set of intended parents.

This is actually more common than most people realize. The compensation for a couple egg donations, added to a couple's savings and other options, may make surrogacy a financial possibility. The intended mother may even decide to go through a shared cycle to reduce her fees for the egg retrieval in relation to her surrogacy.

Those outside the surrogacy community may have trouble understanding the mindset behind these phenomenal sacrifices. But to those who have been struggling with infertility for a very long time, even with the financial hardship, surrogacy is dream come true.

[ad_2]

Source by Rayven Perkins

The Baby Shower – Why It's Called That, and How to Have a Great One

[ad_1]

Someone you know, a friend, the child of a friend, your son or daughter is having a baby. You decide to have a shower for them. Someone asks what they can do to help, what to bring, and all the details. The baby shower is an important ritual in the pregnancy and birth process, a tradition that goes back a long way. Here's a short history of the baby shower, and seven ways to make it the best one yet.

Why a shower? Is it because the mom to be will be showered with good wishes and good will? Because she'll be showered with gifts? Or is it because of the shower of happy tears that will flow during the event, one of the happiest, most solidly traditional milestones on the way to becoming a mother?

No one seems to know the exact history of baby 'showers', and much speculation centers on the fact that whatever theory arises can not be proven. Perhaps at one of the common tea parties held for the expectant mom, a rain shower was a sign of good luck and good fortune for mom and the little one. It is true that during those tea parties, held for women who, in earlier times, were expected to stay hidden during their pregnancy, attendees, always women only by the way, carried umbrellas along hoping the fortunate shower would appear. No matter. The baby shower is a solid part of traditional pregnancy now. Here are seven tips on creating and promoting the best baby shower under the sun.

1. One thing that is known about baby showers of old is this. Most of the gifts were handmade. There's no reason to bypass this. We are dealing with tradition, after all. It takes little time, and less technical skill, to create a simple garment, baby toy, crib mobile, nightstand decoration or other knick-knack that mom will cherish as part of the happy time before delivery.

2. If you're not feeling creative, get on-line and find an artisan site such as Etsy etc. and commission a personalized gift. Include names, dates, secret insider information on it. This could be the one gift mom and baby will keep forever.

3. Depending on how close you are to the mom to be, why not a real shower? This is reserved for spouses, or truly intimate friends, but there's nothing that says I love you, I care for you, like a royal shower of pampering. Purchase bath oils, candles, incense and the expectant mom's favorite soft music. Then give her a bath or shower, followed by a long, lingering total body massage, just like you would have with your own child during a time of transition and change for them.

4. If there's a register, such as babies-r-us, check it out and obtain whatever your pocketbook can handle. Have it delivered, or take it along. If there's extensive travel involved, for you or them, be sure to observe size and weight limits for whatever gift you obtain.

5. Do not forget to include the other kids, if there are any. A small token, inexpensive toy, age-appropriate clothing item or healthful snack items, to recognize them, and to include them in the event will be much appreciated, perhaps even more by mom than the child.

6. Make sure you recognize the mom to be in a way that preserves her autonomy in the process. We tend to focus all our attention on the soon to be newborn, and neglect mom. We assume a lot: That mom allows touching her belly; that she's willing to share the baby's sex – if she knows; that she enjoys hearing advice from people, especially those who have no kids of their own! It could be the best gift of all for a baby shower to shower mom with the assumption of maturity. Assume she knows what she's doing, and everything else will follow.

7. Finally, make sure mom to be actually wants a shower in the first place. These days, with everyone working full time, chaotic schedules, other kids, busy spouses, it's possible the traditional shower will just rain on mom's already hectic parade of responsibilities. The way to find out if she would like a baby shower? Ask her.

Baby showers are about babies, and moms to be. They can be a great way to acknowledge the bonding and communal inclusion of women preparing for the birth of a child. One final note. Because every child, and every mom, needs to feel this inclusion, do not forget that adoptive moms and dads need this recognition, too. All the ideas above will work equally well for parents about to, or in the process of adopting.

[ad_2]

Source by Edgington Byron